Coffins are not things we like to think about, which is one reason why year after year, many coffin makers work so hard to make them look good. And when it comes to comfort, they’ve really done a remarkable job making folks believe that these things are really comfortable. In fact, some mattress makers even advertise how much their products feel like sleeping in a coffin! And believe it or not, there are even “smart coffins” out there complete with built-in screens, for social feeds, videos, and photos. They even have speakers and flashing lights! However, the man in this joke wasn’t too impressed with the coffin that followed him home on one foggy night.
When behind him he hears:
BUMP…
BUMP…
BUMP…
Walking faster, he looks back and makes out the image of an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street towards him.
BUMP…
BUMP…
BUMP…
Terrified, the man begins running home, the casket bouncing quickly behind him.
FASTER
FASTER
BUMP…
BUMP…
BUMP…
He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, and slams it shut and locks it behind him.
However, the casket crashes through the door, with the lid of the casket clacking
Clapity-BUMP…
Clapity-BUMP…
Clapity-BUMP…
on his heels, the terrified man runs.
Rushing upstairs in the bathroom, the man locks himself in. His heart is pounding; his head is reeling; his breath is coming in sobbing gasps.
With a loud CRASH the casket breaks down the door. Bumping and clapping towards him
A man screams and reaches for something, anything, but all he can find is a bottle of cough syrup! Desperate, he throws the bottle of cough syrup at the casket and…
The coffin stops.
