If you work in a job where you have to interact with the public in any capacity, you’ve likely encountered some really clueless people. Not only are people clueless sometimes, but even when they’re being ignorant, they can be rude. It’s been a long time since I worked with the public, but my husband has a lot of customer service experience. His patience when he’s on the phone doing business for us and even when he’s talking to our kids or his parents just astonishes me. He’s just a really laid-back and patient guy, and he never loses his cool. How does he do it? I’ve asked him. He told me that he just doesn’t take it personally. He says that when people are being clueless or even rude, it’s usually not personal. They’re just mostly wanting to be heard. So the next time you encounter a difficult customer, keep that in mind. Enjoy these hilarious experiences from people working with clueless customers. We don’t know if they’re all true, but they’re hilarious regardless.
1. Back in my Best Buy days, a woman came in complaining that her iPod had a virus. I turn it on and it’s working fine. She says it only appears when she connects it to her PC, so I hook it up to our machine.
It connects, and the “Do not disconnect” message appears, complete with red “no” symbol.
“There! That’s the virus! What does that mean?”
2. It was amusing listening to a waiter at an IHOP try to explain to a customer why they couldn’t order “Never ending pancakes” to go.
3. Worked at Best Buy about 4 years ago for a summer. A lady came in insisting that her son wanted a Playstation 3. Then she saw the Wii steering wheel and said: “That will work with the Playstation right?” I told her that the Wii is a different console made by a different company -so no it wouldn’t work. She snidely says “Oh. So I have to buy a whole different console from you guys JUST for it to work? Typical.” then she adds “But you gotta make commission somehow right?” and walks away.
4. Working at a book store.
CUSTOMER : Do you sell the Bible here?
ME : Yes we do. Which version would you like?
CUSTOMER : The Bible.
ME : Yes, I understand, which version?
CUSTOMER : The one Jesus wrote.
5. I used to work at RadioShack and I had a lady come in and ask for a radio capable of getting broadcasts from the middle east. I showed her a few, she purchased it and asked me to help her tune it. I found some stations from various middle eastern sources, tuned them as she stood there with this puzzled look on her face. I asked what was wrong and she looked at me with this seriously grim expression and said,
“How am I supposed to track terrorists if they don’t speak American.”
6. “Thank you for calling Starbucks, this is Jeff. How can I help you?”
“Yes, where are you located?”
“We’re at the corner of Main and Magnolia.”
“And where is that.”
“Do you know where Main Street is?”
“Yes.”
“Do you know where Magnolia Avenue is?”
“Yes.”
“That’s where we are.”
“Well I’m standing at that intersection and I can’t find your store. Is it underground or something?” [looks out the window and sees a woman who looks lost]
“Ma’am, turn to your left. Do you see a man in a green apron waving at you?” [begins waving at her]
“Yes.”
“That man is inside a Starbucks. Go there.”
“That’s not Starbucks. That’s Quizno’s.”
“Ma’am, I’m very confident I’m in a Starbucks right now.”
“You’re not very helpful.”
7. Lady called in to tell me that her computer had been taken over by the Matrix. I asked her to move her mouse. “Omg! It’s back to my normal desktop screen! What happened?”
“Ma’am, someone installed a Matrix screensaver on your computer. Anything else I can help you with today?”
8. When working at Wal-Mart electronics around 8 years ago, I dealt with a sudden torrent of people returning wireless products. They were furious that these devices needed to be plugged in to charge. I had customers insisting that the other employees said their phone/keyboard/controller/etc. would “absorb electricity” from sockets as they walked around the house.
We had to put up “wireless devices do not charge wirelessly” signs around the entire department.
9. “If I install 32bit Windows twice, will it become 64bit.” That conversation lasted 2 hour
10. If these t-shirts are buy one get one free why can’t I just have the free one?
11. I once had a customer bring back a laptop she bought the day before claiming it was broken. She said it wouldn’t open, I asked her if it was windows not loading up or a program not opening, she said the laptop itself wouldn’t physically open.
I took it out of the box, opened it up and just looked at her. Her mouth fell open, she looked at me and said “Oh, it opens that side! Me and my sister tried for an hour to open it up last night and couldn’t.”
She had been trying to open it from the hinge side.
12. While working at Disney I got asked what time the Three 0′ Clock parade started…. I had to answer with that famous Disney smile.
13. I worked fast food and a customer wanted a cheeseburger, medium fry, and medium drink. I said ok I will ring you up a #1 combo meal.
This angered the lady who told me that she didn’t want the combo meal just a medium drink, a medium fry, and a cheeseburger. I told her that it would be the same order but this would save her money, but she got even more furious so I politely punched them in separately.
14. A client once asked how much it cost the Plasma truck to come out and refill his Plasma TV.
15. Someone told me that they felt bad when they returned a DVD and forgot to rewind it.
16. Not a customer, but a client, taped an Ethernet cable to the window thinking that it would give them better Wi-Fi reception.
17. My friend works customer service at Canadian Tire. The other day someone tried to return a flashlight, claiming it wouldn’t light up. My friend looked down at the flashlight. It was a hose nozzle.
18. When working windows 98 tech support, I was asked by an older man “what time does the Internet close.” I was so dumbfounded that I couldn’t come up with a witty response.
19. I was at a snack bar for my pool one summer, and a woman asked me what end of a hotdog are you supposed to look through.
20. I worked geek squad once and a customer told me his iPod gave his jeep a virus and that’s why he was having engine trouble now.
21. I work at a sandwich shop.
Someone asked me, “I’m not that hungry. Which is bigger – the half sandwich or the whole sandwich?”
