Have you ever had a surprise party? I’ve had someone throw me a surprise party once, but it ended up not being a surprise because one of the people let it slip to me before the party. However, I reassured that person that I would act totally surprised and I did. It’s just as well because I honestly don’t love surprises. I’d rather know what to expect if you know what I mean. One of the funniest “surprise party” stories I’ve ever read was the one where a man is blindfolded not knowing what to expect and as he sits there in a chair, he farts very loudly. When his wife takes the blindfold off, the room is full of people saying “Surprise!” However, the joke below is ever better than that. This is a good reminder to know exactly what you’re walking into.
Last week was my birthday and I didn’t feel very well waking up on that morning.
I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say,
“Happy Birthday!”, and possibly have a small present for me. As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone “Happy Birthday.”
I thought… Well, that’s marriage for you, but the kids… They will remember.
My kids came bounding downstairs to breakfast and didn’t say a word. So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent.
As I walked into my office, my secretary Jane said,
“Good Morning Boss, and by the way Happy Birthday!”
It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered. I worked until one o’clock when Jane knocked on my door and said,
“You know, It’s such a beautiful day outside, and it is your Birthday, what do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me.”
I said, “Thanks, Jane, that’s the greatest thing I’ve heard all day. Let’s go!”
We went to lunch. But we didn’t go where we normally would go. She chose instead a quiet bistro with a private table.
We had two Martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.
On the way back to the office, Jane said, “You know, It’s such a beautiful day… We don’t need to go straight back to the office, do we?”
I responded, “I guess not. What do you have in mind?”
She said, “Let’s drop by my apartment, it’s just around the corner.”
After arriving at her apartment, Jane turned to me and said,
“Boss, if you don’t mind, I’m going to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I’ll be right back.”
“Okay,” I nervously replied. She went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake.
Followed by my wife, my kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing “Happy birthday”.
And I just sat there…
On the couch…
Sobbing…
Naked…
