When a loving young couple gets married, there’s a honeymoon phase during which they want to spend every waking hour with each other. This is natural and nearly every couple goes through it. However, the time eventually comes where one or the other (or both of them) want to spend some time with friends. And if either of them were enjoying going out to the bar or the club for happy hour occasionally, they’re probably going to want to pick that back up once the honeymoon phase is over. So inevitably, there are going to be arguments about this because someone’s not going to agree that continuing the single life after marriage is OK. In the joke below, you’ll see how one new bride handled it. This is hilarious!
A couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, couldn’t wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies.
So, he said to his new wife, “Honey, I’ll be right back.”
“Where are you going, Coochy Coo?” asked the wife.
“I’m going to the bar, Pretty Face. I’m going to have a beer.” The wife said, “You want a beer, my love?” She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.
The husband didn’t know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, “Yes, Lollipop…but at the bar…you know…they have frozen glasses… ”
He didn’t get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, “You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?” She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale, said, “Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d’oeuvres that are really delicious…I won’t be long. I’ll be right back. I promise. OK?”
“You want hors d’oeuvres, Poochie?” She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d’oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and pork strips.
“But my sweet honey…at the bar….you know there’s swearing, dirty words and all that…”
“You want dirty words, Cutie Pie?… LISTEN UP D**KHEAD! SIT DOWN, SHUT THE F**K UP, DRINK YOUR DAMN BEER IN YOUR DAMN FROZEN MUG, AND EAT YOUR F**KIN’ HORS D’OEUVRES. BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED A** ISN’T GOING TO A F**KIN’ BAR! THAT S**T IS OVER… GOT IT, A**HOLE?”
…and they lived happily ever after.
