My husband and I live in the country and we’ve lived here for more than 20 years. There are a lot of things to love about country living, too many to count. I love it. However, there are some definite drawbacks that I can think of, and one of them is that there are some stupid people out here, just as there are everywhere. And when stupid people have one too many beers, they sometimes do stupid things. One of the things we have to deal with out here in the country is people driving by and knocking our mailboxes to the ground. It’s so annoying. The next day, we have to re-root the poles in the holes and then reinforce the holes, only for these people to come along and do it again on a whim. One of the things we’ve learned to do is to put concrete in the holes so that when they hit the mailbox, our boxes get dented but they at least don’t get uprooted. Whatever it takes. However, the guy in the story below has some ideas that are worth noting. We found this story on Reddit. Not sure if it’s true or not but it’s hilarious. Enjoy!
So way back in the day (mid 90’s or so) my family lived in a log cabin on 10 acres of land in a rural area 10 minutes or so out of town. It wasn’t totally the sticks, but you could definitely hear banjo music in the background sometimes.
At the end of our nearly 1/4 mile long driveway was one of those roads that was also technically a “State Highway”. In the AM I’d trudge down to wait for the bus, when I got home I’d grab the mail and carry it back.
Until one Monday morning when I went out and noticed the mailbox was gone. On closer inspection looked like it had just been ripped out of the ground.
Abstrakt Xxcellence, Pexels
Dad was obviously not pleased. He went to talk with the County Sheriff who happened to live a mile down the road. Turns out it had been happening up and down the road for months . . . someone was tossing a chain over mailboxes and yanking them out with their vehicle. He suspected a guy down the road with his great big lifted 4wd truck, but couldn’t prove anything. Usually happened on Sat and Sun nights with people finding out in the morning.
Also seems the nicer the mailbox the bigger a target, and many had been hit multiple times. People had tried digging deeper, using more durable wood, etc. The guy just took it as a challenge and ripped them out again . . . soft, sandy ground and his truck was a monster.
Well, Dad said CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
A bit about my father. He’s a steelworker with an engineering background and graduate degree. Built like a bear with forearms the size of my fricking legs. Most people looking at him would never think this monster of a man is also brilliant, but he is. The calm, cool type that never almost never loses his temper. But wrong him and God help you.
So Dad goes to Lowes and buys the fanciest, prettiest mailbox they sell. He then proceeds to install it on top of an 8ft long cylinder of 3″ diameter HARDENED TOOL STEEL. But he wasn’t done there. After digging down with post holers and dropping it in, he then filled it in with quickset concrete.
Zachary DeBottis, Pexels
To really sell it he then used some strips of 1/2″ wood to cover the steel core of his now-indestructible Mailbox of Doom. Primed and painted them so it looked like a standard 4″ post. And even had my Mom decorate it with flowers and such . . . he wanted it to be as tempting of a target as possible.
Didn’t even take a week. I went out for school in the morning and found The Mailbox right where it should be. Attached to it was 30ft of chain and an entire hitch assembly. Ripped right off the truck’s frame, sheared the bolts. It was marvelous to behold.
Sheriff gets called over DIES LAUGHING when he sees it. He went to the house of the guy that was suspected and sure enough verified the damage to his truck matched! Fun fact . . . messing up with the mailbox is a FEDERAL CRIME. As in you go to Federal Prison, not those cushy state places.
Dad was unofficially rewarded by the Sheriff’s Dept with a few cases of beer and some venison. And after that every deputy in town would flash him a thumbs up whenever they saw him.
